Fables and Revelations

Have you ever felt like you had it all then, have it slip gently out of your fingers piece by piece like petals sitting in your open palms dancing on molecules of air and out of sight. It’s an awful feeling really these things, having to watch it ride out into the wind. I met a strange lady in the lift with a rather queer accent and an awfully cheery look on her face, she seemed so surprised to see me and told exclaimed, "you are so lucky you have one guy to see you up and one guy to see you home." I'm wondering when I would finally be at home.

Some days seems more alien to me then others of late, this year has brought about much change in my life. I woke up sniffling and feeling like my world was a sound room, as everything sounded hollow in my head. People around me seemed cold to touch at times, their tone of voice and manner as distant as glacier swimming at the lips of the Antarctic. A numbing and chilly experience. My work seems mundane and my drive at times, I had thought had been diminished but somehow it prevails with the dawning of each new day. Little changes are happening around me and I can feel my world evolving beneath me, much to my despair it seemed very much beyond my control. Can’t complain though because nothing horrifically negative has manifested of late for a while, have my dose of occasional bad dreary days that’s about it. Just have to keep walking. I have walked far enough that I think the ghost of the past have been left behind and perhaps; deep down I hope they are very much buried. Sometimes, just...

Do you believe in instrumented incidents? I’m still wondering about that myself, sometimes perhaps sometimes, I suspect if something or someone else is picking me up and flinging me into a tiny stage with the curtains drawn. It’s odd these things; I was speaking to a friend last night about the people and events in my life for the last four months of this eventful year. A tsunami brought about by a quake, time and time again people would walk in and out of my lives that leave these domino effects, always triggering a wave of unforeseen events that radically shape the rest of my days. It’s odd these people, I could count a few. They all have come and gone, like colourful characters in my life, so utterly amusing, where they lead me I never knew until it hits disaster. They are all the same but with different names. The same feeling, different faces, it’s odd that our lives would collide, time and time again.

I sat across you, wishing you would move ahead, I don’t want to know your secrets, I don’t want to know your pain, I wish you would give it up and start anew. Your pain lay heavy in my hands but you know I am only a passenger, a quiet entity, a ghost who would just pass you by, watching and whispering empty words that so gently float by. I have seen the colours of the world turn and evolve; the leaves dance their last three times over. I can’t take your hand and I never will, I’ll remember the sweet memories and the your everlasting smile. The moments of love, laughter and tears, I’ll never forget them though we will forever be apart. Please move on, with every tug at my heart you make me falter and slip, I’m no more that child you met all so long ago. Not the same child you met at the light of the moon, under the stars that night. I pray that you may find a soul with much beauty within who will love you till the end of time. Who would love you much more then the love we had for each ...

I had a strange dream on Friday night. I dreamt of a man and I woke up feeling like there’s still a little bit of his taste in my mouth as I left the room, the next morning. In the dream, his scent lingers in the air as I run my fingers though the murals on these strange Aztec walls that surrounds me. I could feel the roughness of the stone murals against my fingertips as I trace the alien pattern so slowly across the wall. I walked along the paths with greenery sprouting along the pavements on both sides to a musky dark dingy prayer room with stone slabs and cracked murals that have fallen. He was there and lifted me on a niche in the wall and caresses gently me for hours. His soft touch roll down the side of my face and his fingers on my lips. When I woke up, his face remained in my mind a blur, it was a cruel dream. I wish I could see who it was.