Fables and Revelations

Down with some viral flu today, really tiring stuff. Been feeling the ache in my muscles as I dragged myself down from the attic this early morn. Been having a fever since last night and it hasn't gone away for the last 12 hours so feeling the shivers and fatigue. Thank goodness for the company of my sister if not the walk to the docs seemed almost like forever. She such a doll that girl, accompanying me and fixing up drinks for me and such. These little things really makes me appreciate her so much more. Anyway, I'll be wondering in duskwood if you want to find me this very day.

I gleefully dodged commercial love day after drenching myself in a day swimming with work and the hussle and bustle of a new love in my life, a spanking new ibook. My first entry on my wonderful white-washed wagon of a beauty. She sits soulfully without a hum as I tap so gently on the keyboard, trying to get acustomed to the strangely alien feel of the rubbery keyboard protector or so it is named by its geek of a creator. Dashing past the sights of flowers a hundred times their worth only to have them all wither and die in a few days is such a romantic tragedy. To live only to die another day. That sounds like a James Bond Flick doesn't it. I love flowers, I honestly do but only when they are potted and have their roots well grown into the soil, not chomped and snapped up by a slice of cold hard steel and wrapped in inhumanly cold translucent plastic. In a matter of minutes flung around like a raggerty anne doll across the dusty streets of Orchard Road; ironically not much like the...

24 has come and gone, it is a amazing how 365 days have just flickered pass me in a wave of a hand. Gathering the memories of cheer and looking back on the hurt and the fears, I take a step forward in life and leave all the memories behind me. Another year another chapter, I still have not complete my journal though it has been a year now. I was rather surprise at myself, my leather bound journal, still sits beside my bed, sullen and unperturbed by the passing of daily matters. Yes, I talk as if it is alive and well. I keep it close to me; it journeys with me almost every day of my life in the past year. Always sitting and waiting in my bag for me to pen another chapter, to fill in the nitty gritty details of my strange presence in this world. Recalling the number of Muji 0.38 pens that have totally inked themselves out just filling the pages, seems like a dozen or so. This year celebrations were sweet, having a quiet dinner at Brewerkz by the river with my close friends, good company ...

Feeling the rain, I listened to the sound of the howling wind around me. I pull my coat closer and listen. The empty sky grey and lonesome, the rain cold on my lips. Brother wind dances around embracing me in his cold chilly grasp. I gasped for a mouthful of air, my lungs feel a pang coldness sinking in and taking form. I walk on through the soft light rain and the strange dull wind that has changed its tune, turning lifeless and dreary. Falling all around me they tap me so softly like a million empty kisses on my shoulders and on my hands. So gentle caressing me. Ask me again why I love walking in the soft gentle rain and I would tell you the same. Stop, listen and feel the rain.

I saw the grinch on the train today, except he was not really green. He sat not too far away and he had no chin. I look in awe of this undoubtly strange man, who sat with his face scrounged up like a wad of newspapers in hand. He stared very hard at the passing scene of trees and blocks of cascading buildings, of vast spaces of blue and green. I can’t exactly say he got his chin up, because he ain’t got no chin to begin with so I guess heads up would do. He was just another strange man I saw on the train looking rather strange and lanky and sitting around all dressed in blue.

Been down with a horrid viral infection. Been coughing and getting the shivers the whole day. I wonder if this is what it would be like when I get old feeble and grey. It's a sense of helpessness type of feeling that wants to sink in but I'm always trying to jump to my feet and running around in an effort to carry our some new task. It's a crazy push pull effect leaving me utterly exhausted at the end of the day, collasping into a heap in the bed and leaving the world behind till morn. Didn't realize how attached I have become to Wow, been thinking of it all the way home from work, but alas, it was much too late into the night to be looking for a Lan shop. I would probably only be abe to squeeze in half an hour of my time before the shop close its shutters in my face and kick my arse out of the shop. My medication is staring at me in the eye right now, the many coloured pills which so in a leathal second could send me shipped off to the land of the sandman. Turning a bl...

No expectations, no disappointments. That's what I try so hard to stick by, but naturally some expectations would arise with occasions and in various individuals of certain hierachy in life. As with expectations of lovers, parents and siblings. I try to keep my expectations minimal in life. It helps to keep things brighter in a sense when things get horrifically disappointing. I have this searing image of my friend's disappointed look when he heard the news, he was far more devastated then I ever was. All I did was grin and gave him a cheery smile and went down to the Lan shop by myself to game. People do that I told him, you shouldn't expect too much. Disappointment is part and parcel of life, he seemed so wounded because of the entire situation, he knew I was looking forward to it for weeks. Perhaps it was a blessing in disguise. I suppressed a cough and put on my jacket and headed down to Bugis to play Wow alone in a dingy lan shop in a corner of Liang Seah Street. I di...

I never really hear sometimes, words just swim by and around and they take a cartwheel round my brain. I don't always pay attention to everything people say. Sometimes I'm listening to the thoughts in my head. It's strange. Like now, They are just swimming in my head reminding me of the horrid week and how I should just go and play Wow and slay some wolves. Think I would do that tonight. Go slay some wolves. I feel so much better when I'm playing Wow, just running around and undertaking quest. Beats listening to people talking about nonsensical rubbish like relationships and love. It's all really a lot of bull. People don't really like you for who you are honestly, they just like who you can be to them. That's life, face it without the make up and the music. The thoughts of distrust and voyage sinks into my head and my heart, it would be a while before I forget. It's hard to forget these things. It's like a little scar, I pick up little things in lif...

For those who don't believe in me and take matters into your own hands. Fuck you. Don't tell me how much you love me because if you don't trust in me then there's nothing left but empitness.

Don't ask me where I am going Or where I've been Those who tell don't know And those who know don't tell I may not ever make it home That's a chance I have to take Ain't picking up, well, that's the last time I'm opening any doors for anyone. It's been a bad week for me, actually bad would be an understatement, when I thought things were looking up, everything collapse like an avalanche into the villages below and burying every single individual in sight. A grave misunderstanding and an equally painful ending to a sweet morning melody. Good things just don't happen to me ya, I have to stop kidding myself now. This world leaves no space for mistakes, much less for misunderstandings. Speak the truth, shame the devil. I spoke the truth and the world collapse around me. The only key item I ask for in life is trust. Trust me. Trust my heart and trust my judgment. If one loses trust then you have lost all love and respect for me. I think this coming bi...

Okay all is quiet now, things seemed to have settled a bit. Was throwing Spooky around and utilising his holy sqeek technology to relieve some stress. Nuts. Wrote pages and pages in my journal and polished off Meditations, a book i borrowed. Walked for 45 mins in a heels. Breathe. Did some cooking, watch the King of Cocaine try and survive the last hour of his life on Discovery Channel. Stone. Tried to look for some stars. Listen to My Space Holiday a million times over.